I’ve watched God’s transforming power in my dad’s life and now my husband’s life – and I am amazed and grateful. We are better friends. I say this because loving and being loved by my husband and children has made me a changed woman. What Lessons Have You Learned From Marriage? In that case, seek help immediately. 1. Or does something serious need to be addressed? As long as your marriage is OK and you know that you’re the one dealing with issues, try hard to not take it out on your spouse. This is an article about the top 10 things I have learned in my 3 years of marriage. And in 13 years of marriage, I’ve learned a thing or two about marriage – or, actually, 13 things …. 21. 28. What I’ve Learned in Marriage. Make sure you talk and reconnect. I met my husband Wes when I was 19. Regardless of how you may feel, be faithful in word, thought, and action to your spouse. I liked seeing a tangible example of God’s grace and changing power in a person’s life. Don’t fake anything if you are in danger.). Depending on your schedules, you may see each other every single day. How easy it is to hurt someone you love. He would be so opinionated about how to load the dishwasher. Great thought Carolyn. Talk about your days. All of what you read here is about me and what I have done to fix me. We all make mistakes and we all have flaws. It was awkward to be more spiritually mature than he was. That I would find his opinions so irritating. Here are 35 Things I have Learned from Marriage: 1. 9. But I’m also excited to see what will continue to happen in the future. I think my 20’s fell into a black hole. But I’ve learned so much since our newlywed days. So I can not expect my cowboy to be. Not your kids, not your parents, not your best friend. This is how long we have gone to bed together and woken up next to each other since we said “I do”. Your email address will not be published. It is better that you should not vow than that you should vow and not pay.”. But I loved him. Seeing him succeed could mean more to me than my own success ever would. Where has the time gone? Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Outdo one another in showing honor.”. Thank you! In honor of 19 years of marriage, I put together a list of 19 things I have learned. Because of this, I’m a huge fan of praying for each other and praying with each other. Look for the good that your spouse does. I can guarantee you that if you act on your emotions – and you end up stoking your bitterness and anger, it will grow like a fire. I married by husband when I was 24 years old. That I have picked the wrong person. Thank your spouse for taking out the trash, or making dinner, or working hard. Clear your schedule, trade babysitting with friends if you must … just be sure to make it happen. Remember that you are accountable to God, and take heart in Colossians 3:23-24: “Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. 9 Lessons I’ve Learned in 9 Years of Marriage. That I could truly love him more now than the day I married him. This post was originally shared on July 20, 2014. 5. I am certain most people, after being married a long time, have learned many of the same things. Temptations will arise. Be your husband’s closest ally, a friendly port in the storms of life. I think the word Love is such a simple way to say such a powerful feeling. I know how far my husband has come. A marriage following God is an even bigger target. Here is my list of 22 things I’ve learned about marriage: 1) Marriage is worth the work, when your spouse bothers you, realize you are just as annoying. 22. We understand each other so much better. This week my precious sister-in-law is walking down the aisle to a really great guy, and when people you care about get married, it makes you think about your own marriage and anything you’ve learned, the hard way or otherwise, that you can pass on. Even though it was 13 years ago today, many details still stick out so clearly to me. I am excited to be sharing a little of what I have learned. 29. Marriage has purpose. 24. She's happiest when she's hosting friends and family for dinner, going on date nights with her husband, singing along to the radio while driving her kids around, enjoying live performances, relaxing on family vacations at the beach, and spending cozy family nights at home. Stuck in a quarantine? She is the founder of the blog Married and Naked and creator of The Ultimate Marriage Journal. Keep in mind that these things are helpful for us, especially when we apply them. You still need to date each other, though. It may not happen every week, but try to plan time together at least once a month. Yes yes & yes to all of these comments!!! 19. Your fulfillment will help add a spark to your marriage. Just one date will add a huge spring to your step. I’ve learned that even if you can do it better, even if he lets you because he is busy or sick, don’t take his tasks, duties or roles away from him. Walk around your neighborhood hand in hand. Oftentimes that means stepping in to help when your partner is having a rough day (or week or month). It’s much more difficult and will take much more time and energy to get your marriage back on track if you focus on nurturing bad attitudes and a hateful spirit. Honor your spouse by giving your all. 9. God designed marriage to refine us to become more like Him. And I knew that since God already changed him so radically, He could keep making bigger changes. 10 Lessons I’ve Learned In 10 Years Of Marriage. Instead of focusing on offenses in marriage, focus on peace. Home to a Haven uses cookies to ensure that you get the best experience on this website. I would still have to date my husband. Work hard to save money to donate – that just the two of you know about. Hair shavings in the sink could drive me to near insanity. , Thank you for this, Hillary. He was 24. By being grateful for little things, you’ll end up appreciating your spouse and your marriage more. I'm here to guide you with faith-filled encouragement. If someone else is stepping in to encourage and invest in your spouse, make sure you’re encouraging and investing more. In a healthy relationship, though, if you know you’re in a funk for some unrelated reason, don’t take it out on your spouse. I would, sometimes, question  whether or not “Happily Ever After” really exists. I could probably go on and on about all that I have learned so far, but I want to hear from you. 17& 3/4 th years in. What I Have Learned in 44 Years of Marriage. A man could own more shoes than me. And if your spouse isn’t giving his or her all, don’t get discouraged – keep doing it. I’m always curious about what makes other marriages tick, especially couples who have been together for decades. While it’s important to stay close as a couple, don’t forget that you’re each your own selves. Marriage is about loving your husband for who he is, not what you want him to become. You live together. That it takes a a lot of courage to be the one to end the silos espeacially when you believe you nt the one that’s has wronged. She is a professional speaker on a mission to help you create the marriage you desire and deserve. Instead of only serving alone, make sure you’re serving with your spouse if at all possible. ~Mother Theresa 2. But a peaceful marriage can be such a sweet gift both to you and your spouse. Your spouse will seek the approval and encouragement of someone. Now's the perfect time to create a haven! Faith-Filled Encouragement for Homemakers. The physical attraction after years of marriage is just as strong as it was before and while we were dating. But you see, she has been the perfect person to have alongside. I prayed my way through Stormie Omartian’s Power of a Praying Wife a few times. That our arguments over money would never stop. 3. 2. First off guy and gals if you are going to cheat just end the marriage now. 12. Where? Not that we were aware of that at the time. Pay what you vow. We’ve grown together so much. Intimacy plays a vitally, and I mean vitally,  important role in a successful marriage. Required fields are marked *. It can be frustrating at times. If I complained or nitpicked about every single annoyance, I would easily become a nagging wife no one would want to live with. As you are on this journey, here are a few lessons that I have learned after 22 years of marriage. 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